“Perfect, Proper Panto” - The Times
SNOW WHITE PANTOMIME SCRIPT
With two Good Fairies and a Wicked Queen this script has some great parts for women! This is a bang up to date and hilarious re-telling of the much loved age old story and a brilliant choice for groups keen to foster younger talent.
17 Characters (inc 7 Dwarfs) plus 1 Cameo Role, plus Chorus Etc.
Run time approx: 2 hours plus interval.
SNOW WHITE PANTO SCRIPT EXCERPT
The inept Bogwort and Stinkwort have been ordered by the wicked Queen to take Snow White on a picnic in the woods in order to murder her…
STINK:
Oh, Boggy. I don’t want to do this!
BOG:
Neither do I, but we can’t go back to the Queen empty handed. Otherwise, it’s - (Mimes cutting throat.)
STINK:
I know! I know! But killing Snow White!
BOG:
I tell you what. Only one of us needs to do it. Let’s toss a coin to choose who.
STINK:
Alright then.
BOG:
Heads I win - tails you lose. OK?
STINK:
OK.
(BOGWORT tosses coin.)
BOG:
I’m really sorry, Stinky. It’s tails.
STINK:
Oh, no! I always lose!
BOG:
She’s coming! Now just remember – (Indicates hamper.) all the weapons are in there.
SNOW W:
(entering) I’m really hungry! I think we should eat. (Goes to hamper.)
STINK:
(bursting into tears) No, Snow White! (To BOGWORT.) Oh, Boggy, I can’t!!!
SNOW W:
Stinkwort. What’s the matter?
STINK:
(wailing) I’m really, really sorry, it’s just -
BOG:
SNOW W:
STINK:
BOG:
STINK:
SNOW W:
He’s hungry, Miss. He’s crying with hunger that’s all.
Oh, poor Stinkwort - let’s unpack the hamper then.
No, don’t unpack the hamper!
We’ve got to unpack the hamper, Stinky.
No, no, no, don’t unpack the hamper!
Why ever not? (Opening hamper.) It’s the only way we’re going to –
(SNOW WHITE has opened the hamper. It’s full of assorted weapons.)
I don’t understand. It’s full of guns and daggers and - a club! (Taking out weapons) Why have you brought all these horrible things to the wood?
STINK:
(blurting it out) Because the Queen wants us to murder you!
SNOW W:
Murder me?
BOG:
SNOW W:
BOG:
But why does she want to murder me?
I really don’t know, Snow White – look, let’s not make things any more difficult than they already are - Stinkwort, here, is a highly trained -
(A renewed burst of sobbing from STINKWORT.)
SNOW W:
STINK:
BOG:
SNOW W:
Stinkwort? Stinkwort’s going to do this?
But I can’t!
Pull yourself together, Stinky!
(grabbing the club) Well, if you want Stinkwort to murder me, you’ll have to catch me first!
BOG:
Hey, give that back!
SNOW W:
(Bashing BOGWORT who clatters into STINKWORT.) Here you are, take that – and that – and that! (Runs off.)
SNOW WHITE CHARACTERS
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Fairy Goodheart (A student fairy. Earnest and enthusiastic. Could be played slightly older)
-
Professor Wonderwings (A senior fairy, rather Headmistressish)
-
Queen Grimelza (The glamorous killer queen. Snow White’s stepmother)
-
Oswald (An oily baddie)
-
Speak True (The Spirit of the Mirror)
-
Snow White (A young princess. The principal girl)
-
Dolly Dumpling (The Royal Housekeeper. Warm hearted Dame)
-
Danny Dumpling (Dolly’s son. Happy go lucky)
-
Prince Frederick (The principal boy)
-
Bogwort (Wicked Woodsman of the Wild Wood. Soft hearted and inept)
-
Stinkwort (Another Wicked Woodsman - and even more inept)
-
Chorus as Courtiers, Servants, Woodland Animals, A Bear, Spirits of the Wood, Guards, Grimelza’s Acolytes etc.
THE SEVEN DWARFS
-
TD
-
Grouchy
-
Snoozy
-
Sniffly
-
Cheerful
-
Dozy
-
Junior
NB. The Dwarfs are often played by children. If so, the most experienced and confident should play TD and Grouchy. Junior is a sweet, silent part for the youngest of the troupe.
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